1NetezNet

It always amazes me how fast people manage to move on soaps, when we moved at the start of this year it took a lot of time and effort to prepare — we hired movers, searched for budget van lines, dealt with solicitors and agents galore and generally killed ourselves along the way.

On the telly people decide they are going to move on Monday and are in their new gaff by Tuesday. Apparently soap characters don’t need to get a moving quote like the rest of us mere mortal types.

I suppose I shouldn’t complain though, let’s be honest it wouldn’t make for very interesting TV if they did show all that!

Neighbours made me chuckle today, Zeke managed to knock out Ringo, because he had a martial arts tutor for all of about 2 weeks that he was away from home.

What has happened to Zeke any way, ridiculous ‘he learned how to fight in 2 weeks’ storyline aside, he’s been a total douche since he returned and is suddenly apparently super attractive to the opposite sex.

That’s one thing I hate about soaps, the way they completely change people’s characters over night with no real explanation. It’s the same with Peggy from Eastenders, from doting mother to murderess in five minutes flat!

I wouldn’t mind finding myself a martial arts tutor you know, now that I am really not getting any where weight loss wise with cardio I have been thinking about taking up something like yoga or pilates, but a martial art may suit me more!

You can find a martial art tutor at martialartstutor.com, a really useful website I came across a few days ago. It’s definitely something I am going to look into, and if it is not too expensive I reckon I am going to go for it.

Oooh how exciting, a new venture for me

Have you seen the latest storyline in Neighbours, Donna’s mother has turned up with her mind set on dating a millionaire, specifically Paul Robinson — it’s stupid because she hasn’t even been in the show for a week and he’s already falling for her, they will be married within a month at this rate. Soaps really are unrealistic aren’t they, shocking!

Err…what?

That was really not a classic big Eastenders storyline. I am usually a blubbering mess at the TV these days but that evoked no emotion at all. Ronnie is so unlikable it’s hard to care about her and I don’t feel we got to know Daneille/Amy enough to really feel her death.

As for Archie, yeah the guy was a douche…nasty piece of work and seriously fucked up, but he wasn’t that bad.

The big reveal was lame, cos there really wasn’t that much to reveal.

The story was unbelievable because Ronnie had hated her dad for all the things he had done her entire life, but conveniently forgave him in about 5 minutes for no apparent reason.

The only thing I came away with from the episode was that I hope Janine goes to jail for running Danielle over and that I will probably be pissed off when in true soap style she just gets away with it and it’s forgotten within a few weeks!

Boo Eastenders, try harder!

I can’t think of aloe vera without thinking of Vera Duckworth from Coronation Street, I don’t know why — it just sounds like Jack saying hello to his wife to me and it makes me chuckle!

That silliness aside, I have been using aloe vera as part of my skin care routine for as long as I care to remember now. A habit passed down from my mother who has had me using lotions and potions and every thing in between on my skin since I was a teenager — I will thank her when I am older and get wrinkles much later than every one else she always tells me, and I am sure she’s right — Mothers always are

I have never been much of a crier at the telly, maybe once a year something would get me and I’d have a little sniffle, try to hide it as much as possible and then move on.

The last few weeks someone only has to look upset on the telly and I will start crying, full on tears rolling down the face and an inability to speak properly.

I cried when that bloke, whose name I can’t even remember now, died on 24 and Jack sat looking all forlorn by his body.

I cried during Neighbours when Callum saw ‘Santa’ in the sky and started to believe.

Yesterday I cried almost non stop through The Biggest Loser Australia, when Cosi, Alison and Sam turned up, when Alison and Shannan were reunited, when Sammy couldn’t look at herself in the mirror and then I was unstoppable when Alison mentioned having lost her husband recently.

I’d blame hormones, but I don’t think that’s it.

Maybe I am just getting more sensitive in my old age?

I have never really fancied Jason Grimshaw from Coronation Street, but I saw him today all kitted out in his work gear, hard hat and Magnum Boots included and I though…hmm…actually, swoon!

Isn’t it funny when that happens, he’s been in the soap for many years now and all of a sudden I find him attractive!

I am not complaining though, it’s always nice to have a new soap hunk to drool over — any storyline can be made interesting when it contains a hotty

You can pick up Magnum boots and so much more at CopShoes.com if you need to, they are a well established and trusted retailer who are known for their great customer support.

Imagine my surprise a few days ago when tuning in for my daily dose of Neighbours, only to see a strange woman in place of Libby Kennedy — who is she and why is she pretending to be Libby?

At first I thought I was either drunk or still sleeping, but no, they really did just change the actress who plays her without warning. Scary!

Well except there was a warning, at the start of the episode there was a little addon to note that; ‘In this episode the part of Libby Kennedy will be played by Betty Bob*’ — only I always fast forward that part so I didn’t hear it, that’ll learn me.

Google reliably informs me that the actress who usually plays the Libster got a bad case of pneumonia very suddenly and it was too late to write her out of the story lines for a few months (she has a wedding coming up don’t you know!) so they made the decision to just replace her temporarily.

Fair enough.

* Not the actress’ actual name, it’s something much more normal than that, I just don’t remember it off hand.

I am thinking of making a new feature here on 1netez to house my rants on things that annoy me on the telly, and I don’t mean characters on shows — I mean silly random things that no one else probably even notices.

Like the fact that in shop scenes there are never any of those pesky customers getting in the way of the shop assistants conversations — The Cabin in Coronation Street for example is always either empty, or has one regular cast member in it. Come on now, how much would it cost you to pay the occasional extra?

Another thing that bugs me, the way that people on TV shows seem to be able to pick up any old concert tickets they desire with no consideration of the logistics or cost — want some San Antonio concert tickets for a big gig happening tonight? No problem, just wander off for a few minutes and you’ll be back with them in your hand as if by magic. Want tickets to see Coldplay? No worries, they sold out every where months ago but if you want to see them then there will be some tickets left over just for you. Want to get some Phoenix concert tickets so you can treat your new lady friend to a concert to impress her? — great, don’t worry that they actually cost a lot of money and you have no idea if she actually likes that band, just go get ‘em got.

Now truth be told, if someone went out and bought me some Philadelphia concert tickets as a surprise I would be pleased as punch, but it’s just not realistic how they do it in the TV shows and that just bothers my stupid over-thinking brain.

I am pretty sure I need to take these things less seriously and not rant for 300 words about them, that seems like the better option.